It hasn’t been the greatest week at work. Not that the work itself has been bad; some of it has been a joy. But you know how it is from time to time; and I’ve been finding it hard to know exactly how to be. In private it’s easy: I can curse and let off …
I drove across South London with my son Silas last night. I did not distinguish myself on the journey. Before we had got through Brixton it had become apparent to me that everyone else out driving that evening was an idiot; was thoughtless; was incompetent; was to be derided. I’m a terrible judge and cars …
One rainy night recently I lost my keys. I dropped them as I ran for a bus in Brixton and didn’t notice until, almost on the doorstep, I felt for them in my pocket and they were gone. I was very upset. My keyring has among its many links a piece of bike chain, coins …
There used to be mice in our house. Sitting at the kitchen table late in the evening I would occasionally see them scurrying across the floor and then disappearing through impossibly small gaps in the skirting. Once, they went into my bag and ate some chocolate. But mostly they kept themselves to themselves and stayed …
A couple of weeks ago I had to use up my last couple of days of annual leave so I went up to the Lake District to camp and walk by myself. There were two reasons for going. One was for the sublime pleasure of those hills in Autumn. But the other was that I …
I was cutting my hair last week. It helps that I have almost no hair to cut because having nothing to cut alleviates the problem of having zero expertise. However, I’ve been doing it for many years, with electric clippers, much as I imagine I might shear a sheep, and I’ve become fairly adept at …
Morning, Chris. Let me start by saying that I’m very happy to be here. Happy to be out of the house, glad it’s Monday. Part of this, obviously, is that I love my work, my colleagues, my students. But it’s also something else. You see, it has emerged, over the past couple of days, that …
I’ve been thinking about remembering. I flatter myself to think that I have a good memory, for the useless as well as the useful. Sometimes they’re the same thing. For instance, I once won £20 from a quiz machine at Heston services on the M4 for knowing which sport is associated with the Drysdale Cup. …
Anyone who watched the opening ceremony of the Olympics on Friday saw something extraordinary: thousands of the world's greatest athletes, after four years of training and self-denial, finally in the moment when they get to compete and exercise the skill and prowess that stems from an absolute commitment of time, energy and effort. Now, in …
You know those terrible dreams where you’re doing something for which you are completely unprepared, amid dazzling publicity, in front of an audience full of experts, where your crippling anxiety grows more and more unbearable until, with your utter inadequacy disastrously exposed and your naked, shambling body burning with shame, fear and embarrassment you are …